Tuesday, July 27, 2010

my breakdown


The day before the wedding I had a break down.  Not a freak out about getting married, or a Bridezilla moment or anything...but a lil break down none the less.  And yes - it was minor, only involved a few tears, and only lasted a few moments.  Thank God.

Here's the situation:  I woke up Saturday morning at my Aunt's house.  My mom and Aunt had gone shopping, my sister and cousins were at the hotel (hung over no less!), and none of my bridesmaids or other sister were in town yet.  My goal for the morning was to do our flowers and last minute DIY projects (ie: alphabetizing the place cards, wrapping the guest favors, bouquets, and centerpieces).  Except, I woke up to an empty house...nobody was there to help me. (To be clear, one of my aunts already promised to help me...so I knew with her help we would COULD do it...it just felt a wee bit overwhelming.)

I SO WISH I had pictures of the insane number of boxes/buckets of flowers I needed to load in the bed of my dad's truck.  (We had loaded most of those the day before, but I had to load about 6 more boxes full of decorations, programs, and whatever else...AND allll of the flowers.)  I couldn't do it....I couldn't fit the flowers in the truck...they were heavy... there was no room...I was tired...my neck was still weird and painful...I thought I locked my keys in my car...and I got lost on the way to the vacation rental house that Tommy's family was at...I was straight grumpy. 

I cried.  I cried as I loaded the pretty flowers into the truck.  I was upset about doing that heavy lifting with my neck pain...and I had a mini "ohmygod- nobody- is- actually- going- to- help- me- with- all- this- stuff- I'm- on- my- own"  moment.  And I had to take a step back....take a few deep breaths...and remind myself that this is a beautiful day, I did have people who were going to help me, and I was being stupid.

It worked.  By the time I got to the inlaws cabin I was EXCITED and ready to do what needed to be done!  My mom, two aunts, and baby sister joined us at the cabin and we set to work.

Remarkably, this activity was one of my favorites of the whole weekend.  It was so special to see these women using their mad creative talents to help make our wedding beautiful...they didn't have to help...they could have gone sight-seeing, or gone to the craft fair in town, or went hiking with their husbands and children.  But they helped me instead - and met each other for the first time - and mingled, and giggled, and it was so nice.

I forgive myself for having that lil break down.  Weddings are packed full of details, expectations, obligations, and so much fun and excitement that it was a lil difficult for me to hone it all in.  So many emotions were running circles in my mind...a lil mini freak out was perfectly OK.

Did you experience a any freak out moments?

6 comments:

  1. From what I've seen of wedding blogs, the bride who doesn't break down at some point is unusual. One bride even broke down the day after and sobbed.

    I remember my little sister breaking down from the stress of too much to get done in too few days.

    Unless you're a confirmed socialite, most people will never put together such a large intricate event in their life. So I'm not surprised anyone would cry! ;)

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  2. I had a breakdown the day before in front of my husband. I had just gotten home from getting my nails done and the stress of everything from the week just took over and I broke into tears. He did a funny dance to make me laugh then made me a sandwich to cheer me up.

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  3. I think everything is so stressful and emotional that a little bit of a breakdown is good. The tears help to relieve some of that pent up anxiety.

    I totally freaked out over Garick not having finished the music until the day of the wedding. In fact, it wasn't really ever finished. But, we had some music so it was all good.

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  4. I would have had a breakdown too. In fact I did. I was stressed when I found that we had wrapped our frosted cookie favors in had absorbed the fat from the frosting. They were greasy. I mean really greasy. I was mortified. But, true to form, my Man of Honor handed me a beer and quipped, "hey, it's rustic!" We burst into laughter at the newest addition to my self-described rustic-themed wedding. It was perfect.

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  5. oh man. i could see myself having a baby breakdown for sure.
    that overwhelmed feeling is the worst!

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  6. I did not know that happened!! I'm so sorry! I'm really glad I made it there to help! It was fun!

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