Yuckity yuck yuck.
My four hour round trip escape up to Flagstaff yesterday proved to be very educational. I am clearly more opinionated about my hair than I thought...as I hate what the lady did with mine. To be honest, I've learned, through this whole wedding ordeal, that I am more opinionated about MOST things, more so that I really thought I was. I care about details. I'm slightly bummed about that - I wish I could just breeze by and not care about it all.
But I care after all. And I did not care for "my style." Granted...it wasn't the worst thing ever, but it didn't feel "good" and I felt super silly, instead of pretty. Picture me with 1990's prom hair. I swear I rocked this same exact style to the Winter Formal in 1996.
I took in these pictures: (low curly bun)
aaaaaand instead of a lower curly bun, I got curls on the top of my head...and in the back of my head. The saving grace of the experience was the rad little flower piece with twigs from duplume. It looked cute! But the rest? Made me laugh.
So now I'm in a bit of a quandary. I have a different stylist that has been recommended to me (by a couple different people!) and so I am interested in contacting her...but there will be no trial run...what she does is what she does that day! Or...do I stick with the lady that did my hair, and just cross my fingers she listens to my pleas next time? OOORRRR...do I practice like a mad woman for the next 11 days and try to do my hair myself?
stupid stupid stupid.
*note: someone mentioned in the comments how I could look so "happy" in those pictures even though I was grumpy with the result. Well...honestly...my sister and I were laughing about it's ridiculousness. But the stylist just thought I was experiencing "bridal glow" (she said that..."bridal glow"...made it even more hysterical to me!)
Bummer. This is what I've been afraid of. (and btw, you still look pretty... but yeah, a bit '90s prom 'do. :P I can't understand how the stylist misunderstood your photos; it seems like your hair would really lend itself to that low bun style.)
ReplyDeleteI (think) I'm doing my own hair (gulp), not just to save money, but because I have curly hair and am picky about how it looks and I've *never* been to a salon and liked the result.
But then I hear stories of magical, professional hair trials in which the bride is made to feel like a model... and I waiver. But yeah. I think I'm going to just practice a bunch on my own.
Could you try your hand at it a few times, and then if that really doesn't work either, maybe schedule the other lady?
I personally never have any luck whatsoever in doing my own hair so way more power to you if you can!
ReplyDeleteI don't want to try and tell you what to do because it's such a personal decision but I know if it was me, I'd have a hard time going to the same lady again after she didn't listen the first time - maybe it's not even that she didn't listen but isn't as skilled at the look you wanted and she thinks this is how it should be?
Good luck any way you go!! I'm sure you will be stunning!
Yeah, she didn't listen the first time, chances are good she isn't going to listen the second time, so do it yourself or call the second lady
ReplyDeleteThe second lady can't really make it worse, but if it's going to stress you out, it's not worth it. I wish I could send you my stylist for the day (but she's booked doing my hair for my wedding on Saturday and she's in WI).
try the new girl! maybe ask to see pics of other bridal styles that she has done? that way you know what she's capable of. all i know is that the first girl basically did the opposite of what you asked....
ReplyDeletegood luck!
I agree - don't go back to the same lady! She didn't listen the first time round and I wouldn't expect much different the second time around.
ReplyDeleteI second Margaret. Try it on your own a few times, maybe get a talented friend to help, and if that doesn't work - then go with the other lady who got a few recommendations.
Good luck!
ugh...how frustrating. I knew the same thing would happen to me which is why I did my own hair...but even with my trial runs I ended up wearing it differently on my wedding day. It wasn't exactly what I wanted...but hey, it worked.
ReplyDeleteFrustration! Call in the backup for sure. Also have a friend practice on you a few times as a backup to the backup perhaps?
ReplyDeleteI can think of nothing more awful than me trying to tame my own hair the morning of my wedding. Every time I have to do something interesting to my hair for a night out I end up sweaty, red faced, crying, and 35 minutes late.
Good luck!
I'd say don't go with the first lady. But...My best friend had a trial that went great and she loved it. She was going for a similar look with a cute nature-inspired hairpiece and a low loose bun. On the morning of the wedding I walked into her room and saw a marshmallow poof with curls sitting high on her head. (NOT quite the look she was going for). After some tears which then turned into laughs, I was able to adjust it to something that was more beautiful than she had originally pictured. I am no hair pro but it was easy to fix hers since it was already done up nice and neat.
ReplyDeleteUm...make sure a curling iron or hot rollers are used to get the smooth perfect ringlets.
Another suggestion. Try doing a test run at beauty school and see what you get. They are cheap and usually up with all the trends. Most are young talented people who will be able to understand "your vision."
Good luck!
Whatever you do, don't go back to the woman that did your hair this weekend. It is very unlikely she'll magically hear you right on your wedding day. Practice yourself as a back up and just make an appointment with the woman peeps recommended. Just remember not to freak out if you do it yourself- with enough bobby pins anything is possible ;)
ReplyDeletei say try the new girl
ReplyDeletemaybe start the getting ready process a bit earlier
but as she is doing your hair, don't be shy about telling her, "oh I would prefer it like this," or "I would like the bun a bit lower."
you already showed the first lady the photos and she couldn't produce what you wanted, so I doubt she can do it with a second look, you know?
besides, the new girl might be so good she can get it with one try! ;-)
good luck pretty
either way you're going to look gorgeous
I would definitely book the other stylist who comes with multiple recommendations. I'd bring the photos of what you want AND what you got at the trial so you can show her why you disliked it and you can have a little consultation prior to her fixing you up. I think it will turn out great!
ReplyDeleteOh no - she didn't hear you at all! If you decide to go with the second lady you should also bring these pictures to show what you DON'T want. You might have better luck steering her in the right direction.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure it will all work out - I can just feel it.
I tried my own hairstyle and love it and from the comments by other bloggers, they thought it was professional before I told them .
ReplyDeleteYou know your hair best and sometimes no matter how well you explain something to someone they simply won't get the same vision as you.
I say try like mad until you get something you like because if you go to the 2nd lady on your wedding day and you're not happy, I can guarantee you that would ruin your confidence, which is not what you want on your special day.
I actually don't think that it looks bad, but it's your day so you have to get what you want. I personally wouldn't go back to the person who didn't listen to what you want. If it's between that and the other recommended person, I say go with the other person - sure, you may not have time for a trial, but the trial with this person went poorly and so you still haven't had her do what you want, and she has also shown that she doesn't listen to you. So if nothing else, go with someone else.
ReplyDeleteBut if you're thinking of doing your own, why don't you tentatively make an appointment with this other recommended person, try doing your own a few times, and then decide if you want to keep the appointment or cancel.. that's what I'd do!
Try the new person and get RID of the lady who did your hair. She obviously didn't listen to you and I'm thinking she must be older to want to use that much freaking hairspray! I don't think she can grasp the concept that you want- lovely, soft, loose NATURAL curls! Not sprayed in place ones! Since you don't know for sure if this new person can do what you want I'd say try to practice a bit- just in case. But if your new stylist is a pro she should have photos of hair shes done before. Good luck!
ReplyDeleteSpeaking from experience, you can't count on lady #1 to listen to you the day of. You DID bring in pictures, and she DIDN'T do what you asked. Period. I say go with option #2 AND #3... that way, if you don't love what the other lady does day of, then you've had some practice to play around a bit yourself afterward.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry it didn't work out. I tried and tried to give my girl the benefit of the doubt after leaving with pin curls when I wanted a bun, but she just didn't come through on the day of, and I HATED my hair. I mean, HATED. So... go with someone else. Please.
Oh man, this was me all over again. Except I had NO IDEA what I wanted. First I wanted it down, then up... In the end I trusted my girl who's been doing my hair for a while now and LOVED the result!
ReplyDeleteGood luck friend. You'll look beautiful no matter what you hair style is!
Don't go back!!! But also don't stress, just get your hair done early enough in the day that you have time to change it if it needs to be changed. And speak up WHILE the next woman is doing your hair, and tell her what happened to you last time. It'll work out!!!
ReplyDeleteTHANK GOODNESS YOU DID A TRIAL RUN!!! Okay... so I think you DID pick the right do for you... I think the hair dresser missed a step. I saw this EXACT thing happen at a wedding two years ago. After going through the whole thing and the bride bawling because she had "fuzzy" girls instead of "smooth" girls they took her hair back down and started by first straightening the hair. Straighten it... THEN curl it... THEN do it. Also think about having this woman do your hair patricialvega.com. The last wedding in Sedona I did - the girl had hair to her chin and I thought there was NO way she was going to have an updo but lo and behold Patricia managed to pull off a miracle. Anyway... those are my thoughts. Maybe try and do this do yourself.... it's possible you'll do a better job. Try it.
ReplyDeleteoh and p.s. after you're straightened your hair and re-curled it... the curling is done from scalp down, not tip up - do you follow?
ReplyDeleteI bet you can do it yourself. Your hair always looks good. Loved the flower though.
ReplyDeleteDitch the first lady - there are no second chances if you've brought back prom hair (I like the last photo with the flower too though).
ReplyDeleteGo with the new girl because you might be too stressed out to do it yourself. Take this from a girl who had no hair trial and went to a random woman on the wedding day because her mom recommended her.
"Mom, why should I go to this lady?"
"She cuts Ang Lee's hair."
"Uhhh Ang Lee is a MAN and doesn't get updos."
But I had no choice since I had no time and was cheap. Ang Lee's barber did a stupdendous job.
I know there are stylists that can do beautiful loose up dos, but it seems like most of them get it wrong. I especially despise the pulled-tight slicked-back ones with loops of hair that looked glued. That's why I always cringe when I hear the word "up do". You never know which it's gonna be. ;)
ReplyDeleteshe obviously doesn't get it!! i say you know she doesnt get it, she's trying to make it an up do not a relaxed modern bun- i say you are better off trying yourself or with someone else (maybe even a good girlfriend you can have practice a few nights) since you KNOW this one doesnt get it! so disappointing i'm sorry but i dont think you have to live with it - and absolutely shouldn't!
ReplyDeleteI'd say either go with the new person and bring a lot of pictures of what you want or try and do it yourself! I'm sure you now your hair best!
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure what to do for my wedding. The last time I had my hair done professionally it was a total disaster and I had to go back and re do it myself.
My vote is to go to a different lady, and take pictures of inspiration, along with your "fail" photos of what you don't want. Chances are, she'll have a lot better Idea of how your hair acts seeing the fail photos, and give you more what you want :)
ReplyDeleteHowever, even though your hairstyle doesn't look bad in my opinion, it's not what you wanted. It looks nothing like the inspiration photos. good luck!!!!! hopefully everything turns out great!
Jen
ReplyDeleteI have people here. Call me. I know who can do a great job.
I think I would go with the new stylist or go back for another trial at the one from today so she could have a chance to do it how you want?
ReplyDeleteAs a fellow curly-haired lady, I have also had this happen to me-- the strange skinny wet-looking curls plastered with hairspray instead of the pretty soft curls that you actually have. I think I would do both things: call the second stylist and quiz her about her style, her products, her use of hairspray and most of all her experience with curls. Book her early so you have time to totally re-do it if necessary. And, then I would practice styling my own and get some nice product (if you don't mind smelling a little like patchouli, my absolute favorite curly hair stuff is Kevin Murphy Motion Lotion. It keeps my hair together in nice thick curls and keeps them soft instead of crunchy. Good luck!
ReplyDeleteOk so this probably isn't helpful at all but how did you manage to look so *Happy* in these photos while Hating the result?! You are a stronger woman than I - the poor stylist would have known I hated it because I'm a s%*$#y faker. :)
ReplyDeleteOn topic - I agree 100% with Stephanova. Is one of your sisters handy with hair? You could get it to dry into your beautiful curls and then have one of them style it into the bun. I also have curly hair and have had horible luck with stylists. If you want to go with the lady that was recommended without a trial run she's got to prove she understands curly hair.
Ah CRAP! Leave her. Go to a new lady. Give yourself a longer time period for hair so in case the new girl screws up you have sometime to fix it.
ReplyDeleteGo with a new person for sure! Even though I think your hair looks lovely, its not what you want and you need to be happy that day.
ReplyDeleteYou didn't give this hair lady your blog link did you :) haha
Maybe wear the flower on the right side? Your guests will see that side during the ceremony.
ReplyDeleteI bet you could d o it your self. It just needs to be lower.. and less curls. haha... this was great!
ReplyDeleteI love your inspiration pics! I had the second saved in my hair folder as well and I know the look your going for. I have super curly hair like you and the only way I've ever been able to get those smooth, twisted curls was to blow dry it straight and then add the texture back in with a medium iron. I love the low slung, loose curled bun look!
ReplyDeleteI used the same inspiration photo (on the left) as yours and also did a trial run with a stylist that just couldn't make it happen. The result: my BFF bridesmaid with a theatre background is doing my hair on the big day FTW!
ReplyDeleteI've been reading your blog for awhile, seeing your photos, and if you don't mind my saying so, I actually think your hair is most beautiful when it's down and curly. People with curly hair often feel they need to restrain it in some way, but your curly blond hair is really, really pretty. Maybe use a styling product to give the curls more definition? Only problem then is how to use your gorgeous fascinator - good luck!
Love the inspiration, damn the execution sucks.
ReplyDeleteYes, to straighten and then curl.
Go with the second lady! If she didn't hear you the first time and she thought you had bridal glow she's not going to hear you the second time.
ReplyDeleteStraighten and then curl.
You will look amazing no matter what!
Just remember to breathe and take it all in. I got married 2 days ago and it was the best day of my life..even though my bustle broke about 6 times and I didn't get to see everyone that i would have liked to. It can't all be perfect so just soak in the love you receive that day and enjoy it!
I say - leave your hair down. Wild & Free & Simple. Just like you. :)
ReplyDeletestephanie@metropolitanmama.net
There is a video on Totalbeauty.com that shows you how to do your hair very similar to your first inspiration shot. all you need is a curling iron and bobby pins worth a try.
ReplyDeleteI am in the same boat. Best of luck.
Same thing happened to me in the search for the right wedding hairstyle. I wanted the VERY hairstyle you want! Had a friend try it out... failed. Then I had my cousin (whom I can be completely honest with and KNOWS me) - do it. Came out perfect. And when she did it on my wedding day - it came out even better than the first time. Hang in there - You'll get this!!!
ReplyDeletehahaha - i gotta tell you. this looks like my hair for 9th grade formal... :)
ReplyDeleteThis really did make me laugh. Especially after I had already seen how pretty your hair was on your actual wedding day. Imagine if you hadn't had done a trial???
ReplyDeleteI totally understand about the suddenly realizing how much you care about details when it comes to your wedding. When my fiance and I first got engaged we planned on eloping and later agreed to have a small wedding because we didn't want to have to stress over...hair, for one.
Realizing how much I actually do care about everything coming out perfectly was sort of a shocker. I wasn't such a picky and devoted person before.
At any rate, loved you actual wedding day hair. So pretty, and definitely part of the inspiration for my own. I like how it's lovely and looks natural yet so so elegant.
x,
July 10, 2011!